Hetalia: Puerto Rico: A Case Study
by Jolee Finch
Summary: Borikén. Puerto Rico. Is she one or the other? Maybe both! She is famous, she is wanted, but can she withstand the pressure? Read what Spain and America had to do with it, with dashes of ironic humor. You'll be able to fully understand if you know your history fairly well. Thank you for reading!
1. Puerto Rico marries Spain

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything Hetalia-related. It is all the work of Hidekaz Himaruya and further anime adaptations. I know the fan made character (as in, the drawing), tends to be male. I also know there are at least a few Hetalia Puerto Rico stories floating around. I've read one: "A Place Called Home" by Hetalia-Otaku. You can be 100% sure mine is different, as it is slightly more political and more in character (I guess!). I hope you get to enjoy both and the others as well.

**Hetalia PR: Micro-chapter One**

A little more than five hundred years ago, a strong, beautiful island emerged. She was young and cute on the outside, but on the inside, she possessed a millenary wisdom unlike any other. Her name was Borikén, and though she was but small, she was fierce. Borikén knew how to keep things to herself and deal with the quarreling tribes at her house. Some of them settled in, while others just died out. Borikén, with her Taíno tribe, led a relatively quiet, comfortable life. Then it was suddenly 1492, and things began to change.

Borikén grew worried. Discoveries, explorations, subtle and not so subtle invasions took place on neighboring islands. Soon enough, Borikén knew those strange countries brought death with them. She began to train, shooing everyone who would come near her. Then, on November 1493, Borikén met Spain.

"Such a quaint, colorful island, Columbus!" shouted Spain with glee, stretching out of his armor for the first time in weeks. "And who is the pretty lady?" Spain inquired, his matador eyes scanning the surroundings.

"Borikén" replied the girl. To some, Spain might have been charming, tall, and handsome, but to her… he was just weird. "I would rather hope for you to leave… whoever you are." On her pretty, sun-kissed features, Spain immediately saw he was unwelcome, but flashed her the best smile he could.

"I'm noble Spain, my dear. It is written in the stars: this dashing conquistador will marry you!"

"What?!" exclaimed Borikén, confused, but seething. Spain went on, ignoring the girl… and everyone else accompanying him. "Yes! We're going to be married! Tomorrow, in fact! You'll learn my language, my religion, my traditions… you'll have your own fort right upon the bay. I can see it, tourists will love it! Remember though, it's all mine now."

While Borikén stood there, her eyes turned to slits and invoking the rest of her tribe, Columbus wanted to chip in: "How about we call her San Juan Bautista?"

"But I'm a girl, you idiots!" shouted Borikén. Spain liked the idea, but only halfheartedly. He was a practical man, so he decided the name had a ring to it and it would be good for the time being.

And thus Borikén reluctantly married Spain. To her fortune—or dismay, we may never know—Spain changed his wife's name and she became Puerto Rico.

**It may and it may not continue.**


	2. Puerto Rico and America

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything Hetalia-related. It is all the work of Hidekaz Himaruya and further anime adaptations.

**Hetalia PR: Micro-chapter Two**

Puerto Rico's marriage to Spain would soon prove to be an unhappy one. Spain was incredibly busy, probably keeping tabs on many "significant others" such as Dominican Republic, Cuba, Mexico, Jamaica… while trying to maintain a smooth relationship with Portugal. Puerto Rico worked hard, wondering if her already extinct tribes really thought the Spaniards were gods. For almost three hundred years, Puerto Rico would display outbursts of loyalty to Spain, but even the Situado Mexicano, or the shipment of gold Spain provided to Puerto Rico, wasn't enough. The Puerto Rican peso, wasn't also enough. Spain grew jealous of England and Holland, who both wanted to marry Puerto Rico, and defended the lights and guns out of them.

Puerto Rico grew tired and ill. Moonshine, sugar cane, spices, cattle, tobacco, cockfighting, and Spanish emigration and immigration flourished all around, but Spain did not really know what to do with her. All his other colonies rebelled against him, which made Spain grow weary. For the last hundred years of marriage, a surly Spain sought her affection. "Forget Mexico," he said, "forget everyone else," he uttered, "Puerto Rico is still mine" he vowed.

Still, Puerto Rico knew better. Her brother, Cuba, had already organized El Grito de Yara in1868, an independence movement against Spain, which was successful. Feeling hopeful, Puerto Rico orchestrated her own rebellion, El Grito de Lares, on September 23 of that same year. Tired as she was, Puerto Rico mustered all the strength and will she could, but failed. Cuba visited her, patted her on the back, amid a chorus of "don't worry, you and Spain will part ways" and "you'll be independent, like me".

Over the next thirty years, Spain would watch over his wife, lamenting how bullfighting never became popular over this side of the pond. He feared he would lose her. He had much to lose. Then, in 1898, the Spanish-American War happened.

Defeated, Spain signed the Paris Peace Treaty/divorce papers on December 10, 1898. Almost like a father, rather than a husband, Spain handed his now exes (Puerto Rico included) over to America for twenty million. Distraught, thinking her ex's strategy was cheap, Puerto Rico settled in with America in a larger house. What America would call progress, she would not know what to call it herself.

A similar scene ensued: "America… I'd like you to leave" Puerto Rico told him. America was comfortably lounging on a couch. "What?!" America blurted out his disbelief. "Look, France tried to marry me when it didn't work with England and now I don't think I'm ready to marry you. Guess what, you could be my girlfriend! That sounds more like what I'd do!"

Puerto Rico stood there, nonplussed. For a glimpse of a moment, she missed Spain. How would she deal with America?

"Spain? Spain who? He's probably crying himself to sleep now. Yes! We're going to be boyfriend and girlfriend! Tomorrow, in fact! You'll learn my language, my religion, my traditions…" America rambled, loud and smiling all the same.

Puerto Rico let out a big sigh. "These were Spain's exact words before we got married."

**It may and it may not be continued.**


	3. The Constitution then what?

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything Hetalia-related. It is all the work of Hidekaz Himaruya and further anime adaptations.

**Hetalia PR: Micro-chapter Three**

After America tried, rather unsuccessfully, to teach perfect English to Puerto Rico (through osmosis, perhaps), Puerto Rico did the unexpected: in 1952, she had her own Constitution. One part of America's brain thought this was great: his girlfriend was looking a lot more like him, with an official, democratic document. The other part wondered if independence was just around the corner… wasn't citizenship enough?

"I have never felt so happier in centuries! I feel I'm finally growing…" Puerto Rico sighed, looking at her new dress and hairdo. She never was partial to dots and dancing shoes, but still welcomed them. One part of her brain thought this was great: she knew the two of them just didn't click. The other part wondered if independence was just around the corner, but she thought about her current situation. It could be said she had the best of both worlds: America would further her industrialization, but from Spain she kept the language. This bothered America, but he gave up, eventually. Deep down, he knew that, somehow, Puerto Rico would embrace his language, his traditions, working ethic… not fully, but legislation could always be passed.

Something else bugged America: Puerto Rico's inherent rebelliousness and constant partying. Also, Spanish. More often than not, America questioned Puerto Rico's love… but marriage? Marriage was so hard, he thought. "Not with her," he thought. Anyone can ask for his hand in marriage, and Puerto Rico wouldn't be an exception. Right? Then America grew distant and restless. He had his own problems to solve: WWI, The Great Depression, WWII, Korean War, Viet Nam War, the Cold War… but Puerto Rico was always beside him. In the good, the bad, and the worse. She thought it couldn't be that bad to be America's girlfriend after all. She forgot he had many significant others, just like Spain. She would visit him regularly, until America decided it was better to have a long-distance/friends with benefits type of relationship. Whatever that meant.

Puerto Rico fell ill again. Only this time, she was afraid America would leave her, just like Spain did.

**It may or it may not be continued.**


	4. Red, Blue, and Green

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything Hetalia-related. It is all the work of Hidekaz Himaruya and further anime adaptations.

**Hetalia PR: Micro-chapter Four**

Three kids pop out of nowhere.

One is annexation, the other independence, and the happy medium calls himself free associated state (which is a true political, demographic term in Germany). These three ideologies cannot live together, but they cannot live without each other. They spend their time, frolicking, arguing, and most importantly, debating. Let us call them Blue, Green, and Red.

Rumor has it Red and Green are a product of Puerto Rico's relationship with Spain. However, Spain denies this. Puerto Rico got rid of his name either way. She felt her case could go on Dr. Phil or Jerry Springer. Spain was dead sure he somehow gave her a population, but not kids of their own. Spain, being the gentleman, remained courteous with her nonetheless.

Rumor also has it Blue looks a lot like America, but with Puerto Rico's eyes and hair. America, the skeptic when he wants to be, wasn't sure about Blue. After all, they never married. Girlfriends, or just girls, never became wives. With fifty states already in the bag, Puerto Rico can always have her own say… so why doesn't she say anything? He mused, over and over. Blue visits America often, but sometimes, Blue can't tell if America's smiles are forced or not.

Red and Green are always bickering about who should run the country. Every time Red gets a turn to pull the reins, Green expects to get credit. Most of the time, he doesn't.

Every now and then, the rest of Latin America waves at Puerto Rico, who bears now a slight resemblance to Borikén to them… but who knows, really? Similar to Grandpa Rome, Borikén/Puerto Rico checks on her children, Red, Blue, and, Green. Yet she always leaves. They are too busy sleeping, frolicking, and debating, to think about her.

Whenever Spain feels the urge to visit, he says hola to the kids and spends quality time with them reading Don Quixote de La Mancha. Blue does not exactly care, but this is normal around the house now.

Whenever America feels the urge to visit, he says hi to the kids and spends quality time with them reading The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Blue is then excited, but America is not sure they understood it 200%. 100% just didn't cut it anymore.

Green secretly hopes America will get tired of checking on them. Despite all that debating, America still goes home without a final decision from any of them. Then he sighs, telling himself there will always be a Wal-Mart for the kids.

**-End-**


End file.
